I can't stand women part 2

September 12, 2008

 

I can’t stand women…

That don’t subscribe and comment on my blogs

That don’t like to shop

With no fashion sense

That don’t keep a clean house

That don’t shave their legs

That don’t shave that either

With no tongue skills

That think all men are the same

That treat all men the same

That don’t text message

Are club regulars

Are Bar hoppers

That Drink more than me

That Smoke

That doesn’t have cable

That assumes without asking

with gaudy ass tattoos

That don’t wear sneakers

That don’t wear heels

That has crusty heels

That makes nasty chicken

That’s on myspace all day

That’s in My space all day

That wants to kiss after they eat something nasty

That plays games (mind games)

That does not play games (Board games)

That rock caked on makeup

That’s had 5 jobs in 5 years

That wears a lot of jewelry

That look like something stinks

That stinks

That wears those spandex-looking tight around your calve and ankle jeans

That’s never been in Crate and Barrel

That don’t like Benetton, BCBG, Macy’s , Saks, nordstroms and Arden B

That don’t like me lol :p

 

8 Responses to I can't stand women part 2

  1. Chanel on August 4, 2006 at 2:18 pm

    I currently own a BCBG dress (size 2) and a BCBG formal skirt (size 4), mind you, I am no longer those sizes… I can still get them on, but it’s a little obvious… Won’t give ‘em up because their BCBG…

    Don’t like a lot of jewelry… my jewelry wear consists of my wedding band and a pair of large hoop earrings…

    As for the text messaging, I wanna learn! It’ll probably make my life a little easier…

    Guess we can remain friends…

  2. Fred Sanford on August 4, 2006 at 2:19 pm

    okay…the caked up makeup…that was one of my peeves…’da hell do you need all that make up on….okay i’ll admit..i got my wifey because i didn’t have cable…i’ll have to tell the story…

    formerly sarccastik!!!!!!

  3. Charles on August 5, 2006 at 10:37 pm

    I’m definitely feeling your page…this joint is hot. I’m gonna have to make you a regular on the daily run down. And all of your things, I’m just about feelin all of them…fa real. A woman who can’t rock the sneaks is a no no to me…if you can’t be comfortable with yourself, how am I gonna be comfortable with you? Plus, ain’t nothin sexier than a hot woman in some fresh air forces…

  4. tenacious on August 7, 2006 at 12:14 am

    dang I thought I dropped a comment my badd

    I can’t stand women…

    That don’t like to shop–Shopping is a drug.

    With no fashion sense–But where will the hot messes I love to laugh at go?

    That don’t keep a clean house–I’m borderline OCD when it comes to cleaning, plus that’s just trifling

    That don’t shave their legs–I hate body hair

    That don’t shave that either—Either it’s waxed to an inch of it’s life or shaved

    With no tongue skills–Ehhh, I talk too much does that count?

    That don’t text message-_You’re talking to the Text Queen of Arlingon

    Are club regulars–I’m not like Cheers, but I do go out.

    Are Bar hoppers–I did a couple of bar crawls in college some fun sh*t actually

    That Drink more than me–**crickets**

    That Smoke–Yuck

    That doesn’t have cable—I need cable to live

    That assumes without asking–You know what happens when people assume you make an Ass out of U and Me

    with gaudy ass tattoos–One small tat on the back

    That don’t wear sneakers–Just copped some crisp air ones

    That don’t wear heels–I’m starting to lean away from flats

    That has crusty heels–Nah the Koreans keep my feet looking tight son

    That makes nasty chicken–even I cant mess up chicken

    That wants to kiss after they eat something nasty–You mean you dont like Doritoes breathe?

    That plays games (mind games)–Trix are for kids

    That rock caked on makeup *lol*

    That wears a lot of jewelry–I wear my good luck charm and earrings

    That look like something stinks *lol*

    That wears those spandex-looking tight around your calve and ankle jeans–F*cking leggings! I hate those damn things!

    That’s never been in Crate and Barrel–Cute store :-)

    That don’t like Benetton, BCBG, and Arden B–LOVE IT

  5. akilah on October 14, 2007 at 6:15 pm

    you are soooooooooooooooo funny…..i am cracking up ova here….

    bubye

  6. chloeoflondon on October 15, 2007 at 9:39 am

    That don’t subscribe and comment on my blogs

    That don’t like to shop(it’s my passion)

    With no fashion sense(this goes for guys as well)

    That don’t keep a clean house(nothing worse)

    That don’t shave their legs(Nair® Bikini Cream – no nicks, cuts, or razor bumps. Removes hair below the skin’s surface in as little as 3 minutes.)

    That don’t shave that either(Sensitive Bikini Cream to work gently — yet effectively — on even your tender areas.)

    With no tongue skills(The perfect kiss would be slow at first, then it would speed up and full of passion and then all the darling little kisses would follow.)

    That think all men are the same

    That treat all men the same

    That don’t text message(For a while my friend kept sending me texts meant for her boyfriend. I’m not sure how that happened, but I never told her. It would a little awkward because the texts were…. suggestive.)

    Are club regulars

    Are Bar hoppers

    That Drink more than me(Chill Vodka in freezer – Cut a thin slice of green apple and stick on the rim of the glass and run it around the entire glass, Fill with Ice and Mix vigorously, Pour/ Strain into a frosted Martini glass and serve w/ or w/o ice. Ingredients: 1.) Top Shelf Vodka (Hangar One, Belvedere, Grey Goose) 2.) Apple Pucker 3.) Daily’s Hard Lemonade (for sour mix) 4.) Cointreau 5.) Green Apple(s) 6.) Ice – )

    That Smoke(occasionnaly when M’Fkr’s works my last nerve,ole habits are hard to break)

    That doesn’t have cable(gotta have cable)

    That assumes without asking

    with gaudy ass tattoos(okay,I have some but there hidden)

    That don’t wear sneakers(okay I own one pair for running/walking)

    That don’t wear heels(8′or higher)

    That has crusty heels(pedicures by Ming lee $25.00)

    That makes nasty chicken(okay,how can you jack up chicken)

    That’s on myspace all day( After connecting with ole friends for a good month,go back and delete your MySpace.)

    That’s in My space all day(Getta life)

    That wants to kiss after they eat something nasty(I carry a toothbrush in my purse for that very reason)

    That plays games (mind games)—-

    That does not play games (Board games)—you got that new Monolopy??

    That rock caked on makeup(why??)

    That’s had 5 jobs in 5 years(stability is a must)

    That wears a lot of jewelry(Beauty supply store jewlery at that)

    That look like something stinks(they stink)

    That stinks

    That wears those spandex-looking tight around your calve and ankle jeans

    That’s never been in Crate and Barrel

    That don’t like Benetton, BCBG, Macy’s , Saks, nordstroms and Arden B

    That don’t like me lol :p(love you E)

  7. don on October 15, 2007 at 4:33 pm

    *applause*

  8. MsSepia on October 16, 2007 at 1:16 pm

    Leaving a commennt, and subscribed….I Love the “on myspace and IN MY SPACE” comment TOO DAMN funny! I love your blog and I like you. You broke it down no one can say you didn’t warn them. (HANDS CLAPPING)

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